For the Puppies.

4 Move Win! — December 2, 2018

4 Move Win!

Quick Tic-Tac-Toe • Won a game in 4 moves

There’s something quite cathartic about noughts and crosses … but there’s also a sense of relief that comes with being able to earn an achievement while your internet is out for three days (technician scheduled for Tuesday).

This one was fairly simple, and it goes to my default noughts and crosses tactic of the ‘L’ shaped manoeuvre. I’m not going to beat around the bush … it’s an unstoppable tactic, and when even the computer AI struggles, you get a great sense of accomplishment.

Without the internet, I haven’t played a heap of my consoles today, so it’s another win for iOS.

Golly Gosh! — November 9, 2018

Golly Gosh!

Rick and Morty: Jerry’s Game • Popped 500 Balloons in a single game • 10 points

I love Rick and Morty. For a long time, I actually only knew about them as a vague pop culture phenomenon in the same style as South Park or Family Guy, but when I dedicated a bit of time to watching it, I really loved it and now I’m no longer left in the nerd wilderness when it comes to certain Rick and Morty memes or phrases.

This game, however, eludes me.

I’m not sure if there was an episode I missed where Jerry was playing this game, or if he designed this game, and it’s quite possible that in watching the entire series thus far back-to-back that I have glossed over some of the smaller details seeded in the episodes, but I’m really not sure how this fits into the overall universe. It’s possible it doesn’t, and this is just a random play on the character of Jerry, which actually makes a lot of sense, but I just wasn’t sure where this landed in terms of context.

Not that it really matters I suppose, because, at the end of the day, this is a game where you pop balloons … and not much more. I can see where the appeal lies in this game because it has some stretch goal achievements built into it, but I figured 500 balloons is probably enough for one lunch break.

Tonight is likely to be more Red Dead, but I’m starting to see some movement in the Hitman space as well, so if that’s dropped, then I’m going to sink some time into that as well this weekend … in among a whole heap of other ‘flurry’ that’s happening. Least of which is a Christmas parade which my family is looking forward to, whereas I could see myself using that time more effectively in smashing through the RDR2 campaign … all part of the journey of life, I guess.

Ho. Ho. Ho.

Confessions of an English Opium Eater — October 12, 2018

Confessions of an English Opium Eater

Screen Shot 2018-10-12 at 4.01.19 pm

Asphyxia • De Quincey confides in Samantha

I feel like Fridays are a good day for some Japanese Visual Novel gaming. There’s something about the slow pressure of everything that is, or was, due the past week needing to be done before you go home, but at the same time, there’s elements of set-and-forget in VN’s that really appeal to the overlap between my sense of wanting to play games, and my needing to do ‘actual’ work.

Some confessions: yes, I’m using a guide to work my way through the multiple endings of this game, and yes, I’m using auto/skip mode. This is nothing more than an achievement harvest for me – and I make no apologies for it. For purists, I promise you, I have a whole swag of achievements ready to pop on Forza Horizon 2 and 3 tonight (I didn’t realise how close I was for some achievements of FH2 until I looked at the ‘Forza Hub’ App this morning), and I have plenty of indie games kicking around if you really, really need something ‘more’.

But, this is my blog – my challenge. And, as I say, no apologies.

In other gaming news, my usual coffee lady discovered that I had a passion for esports, and introduced me to her husband who I’m led to believe has a stake in the Direwolves. I had to hover between being commercially envious, and simultaneously excited about the opportunities that someone with the same level of passion and enthusiasm for gaming as me had. Like a giddy fan, I left him my name, email and number – but I feel like he’s in the same position as me … ready to make the leap but not quite sure where the market lies and how to go about it.

Time will tell how this plays out.

In the meantime … there’s some Japanese Visual Novels to play … well, read … well, turn on and start, anyway …

100 Taps — September 16, 2018

100 Taps

The Ultimate No Life Test • Muy bien Señor! (Tap 100 times)

I’ve often said that there’s something to be learned in the experience of these ‘quick-and-dirty’ achievements. Even where there’s no real challenge, gaming as a medium has evolved to a point where it should be something that you ‘experience’ beyond static media like film or photography.

So, even tapping a big, red button should invoke an emotion out of you like any other art. And, to be honest, I’ve spent the day at a waterpark with the kids so I’m not convinced I’ve got the energy to have emotions, but I will attest to it being ‘an experience.’

If I’m perfectly honest, my look at the achievement list excited me most as there were options there for the next few days before I go home. I seem to be struggling on a few of my games to earn something quickly, and so I’ll be whittling away at a few levels tonight in order to have some options ‘in the bank,’ but I will be the first to admit – I am absolutely looking forward to getting back to Destiny 2, Spider-Man, and the whole heap of other games I’ve got on the pile of shame to get through!

Stopped The Invasion — August 1, 2018

Stopped The Invasion


Sakura Agent • Put an end to the invasion

I feel like we have reached a point in social progress where almost everything has become acceptable. In the words of Assassin’s Creed: Everything is Permitted.

I am not, however, convinced that playing a game about scantily-clad Japanese Secret Agents save the world from ‘incursions’ while on your lunch-break at work has quite reached mainstream acceptance yet. I suspected that there might be a ‘hint’ of suggestion in the game just by virtue of its genre, but I never quite expected salacious crotch-shots and lingerie-as-evening-wear revealing.


Now, before you get the wrong idea – I am absolutely not a prude. I bloody love a good Asian cartoon soft-core semi-pornographically influenced visual novel as much as any other red-blooded thirty-something heterosexual male. I am certain there is an argument to be made for the sexualisation and objectification of women in games – and I absolutely support that, in truth, I spent most of my time while the game was loading searching for the right sequence of answers to get me through the game with a 100% achievement completion rate – my issue is more that this game was such a shock on an otherwise normal Wednesday afternoon.

I mean … I was having leftover spaghetti bolognaise, and next thing you know … blammo – crotch-shot. It’s a good thing I didn’t wear a white shirt today.

What pleases me most about Sakura Agent is that I’ve finished it. I am satisfied to have collected all of the achievements in this game, thanks to the aforementioned walkthrough. Done. Fin. The End.

I understand that there are other games in this series under the broad heading ‘Winged Cloud’, which I can only assume is some lost-in-translation title, so this may not be the last time you see the semi-naked cat-loving women grace the pages of this blog … but it’s probably the last time you’ll see it grace my screen during business hours.

Well, certainly in my current open-plan, heavy foot-traffic role, anyway!

Elite Status — May 22, 2018

Elite Status

World of Tanks • You’ve completely researched a tank! • 5G • 30.61% of gamers unlocked this

I’ve been playing the odd game of World of Tanks on PC, and I thought there might be some connection between the console version and PC. I had hoped that some cross-play might be evident, but considering my PC server (Asia) isn’t even on the console list – that optimism quickly left.

I have to say – the console version isn’t nearly as fun as the PC version. I can’t work out if it’s been scaled-back feature-wise (it doesn’t necessarily seem to be), but the controls seem slow and clunky and there’s not a great deal of love in the graphical detail.

I actually earned an achievement for completing the tutorial before this achievement, something that I thought I’d already done – but it seems like, judging from the achievement list, that I’d actually only played a few campaign missions, and had never completed the main ‘boot camp’ mission. Using that experience (as in XP, not the verb ‘experience’), I was able to buy a few different tanks before I logged off tonight, earning me a lazy little 5G for my effort.

My skim of the achievement list showed me a few other quick achievements that I might be able to pickup over the next few weeks, but by-and-large, the meaty achievements come from playing multiplayer online. I don’t think I’ve got the energy or the inclination to do that – but you never know, stranger things have happened. If anything, I have been finding myself scrolling down my game library list with a blank expression on my face simply convincing myself that there’s got to be something worth playing on there. I suspect an inevitable gaming ‘rut’ is about to hit me – something that I’ve been hearing a lot from friends about lately, and I’ve experienced myself once or twice.

In the meantime – there’s a solid five weeks of gaming to get through before I can allow myself a ‘break’. The end is in sight – I’m going to give this final push a red hot go.

Make reactions — May 11, 2018

Make reactions

W.O.R.L.D.S_ Win Own Reinvent Live Discover Sim 11_05_2018 10_17_38 PM

W.O.R.L.D.S: Win Own Reinvent Live Discover Sim • Perform reactions • 20G • 59.98% of gamers unlocked this

I thought I might have been able to get an achievement a bit earlier tonight, but the footy was on.

I’ll let you sit with that thought for a minute – pick your jaw back up off the floor before you keep reading.

This weekend, I have a whole heap of family about to descend – correction: already have started descending – on my house for a birthday party that we are hosting for an elderly relative tomorrow afternoon. That means that, while I haven’t vocally given any resistance, my TV is not my own … and I’m left either waiting until the end of the evening to get onto the console, or I’m left to find ‘other’ solutions.

Tonight’s solution came by way of the Windows store in a little free-to-play game titled, W.O.R.L.D.S: Win Own Reinvent Live Discover Sim.

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Firstly, don’t ask me what that means … I have no idea. It feels like they’ve wanted to use the word ‘Worlds’, and then they’ve slapped a whole heap of words together to get an acronym. Much like some dialogue in the opening episode of Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D …

…It means someone really wanted our initials to spell out “shield.”

Titling aside, this isn’t actually a bad little game for the price you pay. It shares similar mechanics with the Doodle God series, which shouldn’t be surprising considering it’s made by the same developer – but it is packaged together in a way that you wouldn’t think a simple puzzler would deliver.

W.O.R.L.D.S_ Win Own Reinvent Live Discover Sim 11_05_2018 10_11_09 PM

My difficulty in this game actually had nothing to do with the game itself, but just the effort required to install it on my laptop. Opening up Windows 10 for the first time in a little while meant that there was 40 apps listed for update. Forty. Four-Zero. Sure, the mileage varied in the update size from app-to-app, but isn’t it so incredibly indicative of the world we live in today … nothing is permanent, everything is always transient. Often in the world of gaming, we lament the loss of cartridges, in which a whole game was finished, bundled, and sold.

Sure, there are benefits to the world of updates – but let an aging man lament the changing world for a while.